Bluebell's check in

Counting carbs/calories is a drag. Obsessive scale stepping is a recipe for despair. If you want to count something, "days on habit" is a much better metric. Checking off days on a calendar would do just fine, but if you do it here you get accountability and support. Here's how. Start a new topic in this forum called (say) "Your Name Daily Check In." Then every N day post a "reply" to that topic as to whether you stayed on habit. A simple "<font color="green">SUCCESS</font>" or "<font color="red">FAILURE</font>" (or your preferred euphemism if that's too harsh) is sufficient, but obviously you're welcome to write more if you want. On S-days just register that you're taking an S-day. You don't have to do this forever, just until you're confident you've built the habit. Feel free to check in weekly or monthly or sporadically instead of daily. Feel free also to track other habits besides No-s (I'm keeping this forum under No-s because that's what the vast majority are using it for). See also my <a href="/habitcal/">HabitCal</a> tool for another more formal (and perhaps complementary) way to track habits.

Moderators: Soprano, automatedeating

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Wed Jan 30, 2019 10:24 pm

Automatedeating yes they will eat quite a good range of foods although it hasn’t always been that way! Its taken a while to reach the stage where we mostly eat the same meals. I love the way NoS fits in with family life, no special diet food dos and don’ts. Today was success.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Post by Bluebell » Thu Jan 31, 2019 10:28 pm

Today - success
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Sun Feb 03, 2019 9:25 pm

Friday was a fail and the weekend has not been good. Sigh.
I have overeaten and not been in control. I guess there’s nothing to do but mark and move on, back on it tomorrow.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

automatedeating
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by automatedeating » Sun Feb 03, 2019 10:32 pm

Friday is in the past. You can't fail on the weekend. So like you said - mark it, move on, and look forward to reasonable boundaries of Monday.

Hugs Bluebell.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3
8/14-24.5
5/15-26.2
1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6
8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9
3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8;
3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8
6/20-22.5; 7/20-23.0; 9/20-23.6

Bluebell
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Wed Jun 03, 2020 12:49 pm

I’m just going to copy and paste what I wrote in the “Why did you leave? Why are you back?” thread. Reading back over my most recent posts, I can feel the desperation in my struggle with self image, I think (hope) I have moved on from this. I certainly feel positive about coming back to this and I feel I am ready to settle back in!


Well here I am, back again. I had to look up my initial joining date and was surprised to see it was September 2016. I did so well with NoS my first time around. I lost 2 stone and kept it off for over a year, it was the most successful way of eating I have ever tried.
However I eventually did what I always do, return to my old ways and bad habits, as if I have some kind of self sabotage internal switch that eventually has to be activated no matter how hard I try.
I tried a couple of times to go back to NoS and failed, somehow the motivation wasn’t there even though I knew it would be the best choice for me to make. I also tried other diets, low carb, 18:6, intuitive eating. (This I might add is in addition to many other diets I have tried over the years before I found NoS, too many and too tedious to list here!) I also had a hypnotherapy session which actually was a huge help in undoing some of my long standing self hatred about my body which goes right back to my childhood. So while I am feeling much less negative about how I look, I have still piled on the pounds due to overeating and guess what, here I am right back at the exact weight I started NoS at initially.
I had a moment of clarity whilst feeling light headed and awful and desperate to eat during an 18 hour fast, which basically consisted of me saying to myself, what on earth are you doing you crazy woman. You know the best approach, you’ve done it and it worked and more importantly it was sustainable and realistic. It fits in with family life, it doesn’t require cutting any food out, or counting calories or grams of fat, you don’t have to study labels on food packets, you don’t have to pay money to go to a group, it doesn’t even matter if you mess up, you just eat 3 meals a day and get on with your life.
So here goes, No S for good this time, no excuses. I am on day 3. So far so good. I need to find my daily posts wherever they are buried so I can read back and start logging my successes and failures. Thank you for having me back (again!)
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Wed Jun 03, 2020 10:02 pm

I am posting for Monday 1st, Tuesday 2nd and Weds 3rd, all successful.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Thu Jun 04, 2020 6:41 pm

Today - not success, strawberries and cream for dessert.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

pinkhippie
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by pinkhippie » Thu Jun 04, 2020 9:08 pm

Welcome back Bluebell! I also came back to No s recently at a higher weight than when I left it. I also dabbled in 18/6 19/5 etc..

No So really does just seem so much more sustainable, I think that is why I always come back.

Good luck on your journey!

Bluebell
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Fri Jun 05, 2020 10:31 pm

Hi pinkhippie! Good to know I’m not alone in my return! I hope this time around it sticks for both of us.

Today - success. A whole week of NoS with one small slip up yesterday, I’ll take that as a win :) Good to be back, it feels right.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

pinkhippie
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by pinkhippie » Sat Jun 06, 2020 2:26 pm

Awesome! Congratulations on your success! That is so wonderful when something just feels right. I find its much easier to stick to and keep your convictions when it feels right. Have a good weekend!

automatedeating
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by automatedeating » Sun Jun 07, 2020 7:16 pm

Hi Bluebell! Great to see you on the boards!
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3
8/14-24.5
5/15-26.2
1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6
8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9
3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8;
3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8
6/20-22.5; 7/20-23.0; 9/20-23.6

Bluebell
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Mon Jun 08, 2020 10:11 pm

automatedeating wrote:
Sun Jun 07, 2020 7:16 pm
Hi Bluebell! Great to see you on the boards!
Thank you so much😊

The weekend went OK, I did have too many treats but didn’t binge.

Today - success. I am surprised how calm I feel this time around, as if I have accepted my fate :lol:
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

nettee
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by nettee » Tue Jun 09, 2020 5:21 am

Well done Bluebell. I am recently back too. It is good to be here.
3 tasty meals a day and loving it

Bluebell
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Tue Jun 09, 2020 10:35 pm

nettee wrote:
Tue Jun 09, 2020 5:21 am
Well done Bluebell. I am recently back too. It is good to be here.
Welcome back to you, it is a good feeling indeed :)

Today - success
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Wed Jun 10, 2020 10:02 pm

Today - success. I was very hungry about an hour before dinner but I had a glass of milk and managed to last.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

nettee
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by nettee » Thu Jun 11, 2020 5:58 am

Well done 👏
3 tasty meals a day and loving it

pinkhippie
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by pinkhippie » Thu Jun 11, 2020 7:13 pm

Thats great Bluebell! I have the same issue sometimes before dinner and milk has saved me many times. Congrats for sticking to the no snacking!

Bluebell
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Fri Jun 12, 2020 8:18 pm

Thank you pinkhippie and nettee!

Thursday - success
Today - fail at dinner time, we had a curry takeaway, my absolute favourite and I couldn’t resist the side dishes which didn’t fit on my plate - poppadoms and some naan bread. However I did not eat until absolutely stuffed which I usually do with a curry so I guess that’s something.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

automatedeating
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by automatedeating » Sat Jun 13, 2020 3:35 pm

happy weekend, Bluebell!
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3
8/14-24.5
5/15-26.2
1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6
8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9
3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8;
3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8
6/20-22.5; 7/20-23.0; 9/20-23.6

pinkhippie
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by pinkhippie » Sat Jun 13, 2020 4:35 pm

Not eating until absolutely stuffed is a victory Bluebell! Good for you!

Have a great weekend!

Bluebell
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Mon Jun 15, 2020 9:16 pm

Thank you for the support, very much appreciated :)
The weekend was Ok, I did have some treats and I need to think about reigning it in so I only have one or two which I really enjoy. I am happy to have that as a goal. I definitely feel much calmer and more in control than on previous attempts. I think I like myself a bit more, or maybe just have less self loathing, either way I’m in a more positive frame of mind.

Today - success
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

r.jean
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by r.jean » Tue Jun 16, 2020 12:53 pm

I remind myself when I overindulge that it was much worse prior to NoS. We all overindulge occasionally, but now it is with more moderation.
The journey is the reward.
Maintenance is progress.

Bluebell
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Wed Jun 17, 2020 9:50 pm

r.jean wrote:
Tue Jun 16, 2020 12:53 pm
I remind myself when I overindulge that it was much worse prior to NoS. We all overindulge occasionally, but now it is with more moderation.
Thank you r.jean very wise words indeed.

Tues and Weds - success
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

jenji
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by jenji » Thu Jun 18, 2020 2:26 pm

Welcome back, Bluebell!
I'm a 49-year-old mom and non-profit CEO
I am 5' 7.5"
Began No S at 184#, BMI 28.4 - 9/25/2017
Current weight 173#, BMI 26.7 - 09/05/2019

Bluebell
Posts: 633
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Fri Jun 19, 2020 10:48 pm

jenji wrote:
Thu Jun 18, 2020 2:26 pm
Welcome back, Bluebell!
Thank you jenji :)

Yesterday and today - success
However I did really really struggle with wanting to eat around 4pm, this seems to be a real ‘slump’ time for me and I have often found myself reaching for food. In fact its my most likely time to have what I think of as a mini binge where I mindlessly eat for the sake of eating for a little while. I can’t really see any way through other than getting through a day at a time until its not so difficult. I do recall from last time that things became easier as I settled into the routine and formed better habits.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

oolala53
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Location: San Diego, CA USA

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by oolala53 » Sun Jun 21, 2020 5:34 am

Bluebell! So nice to see you.

Yes, there is an amazing solidity that comes with accepting that something is your best option and that best option is actually not asking for the moon. Knowing I just could not sustain anything else ten years ago was what kept me at No S, though I sometimes added "layers" in, usually to great frustration. (You'll sometimes see me ask people who are waffling or fretting over not losing on No S, "Honestly, even if you aren't losing, what are your options? What are you going to be willing to give up, week after week, year after year?" This is why I am so popular at cocktail parties.) I am older now and have been through most of the bumpy adjustment to some mods appropriate for my age, projected healthspan, and hunger. Systematic moderation is still where it's at. I am still on my other site and have to bite my tongue so often because I keep seeing people flit from plan to plan almost weekly. People really don't like it when you say, "DIdn't you say last week that you were going to do X?"

Unless they give you permission...
Count plates, not calories. 10 years "during"
Age 67
SBMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8
3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (but more fluctuation)
3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux
6/21 22

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.

automatedeating
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by automatedeating » Sun Jun 21, 2020 3:09 pm

I'm starting to think it might be a worthwhile experiment to just start having a super early dinner when you feel that afternoon hunger at 4ish. It has worked well for me, but probably not a good fit for everyone.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3
8/14-24.5
5/15-26.2
1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6
8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9
3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8;
3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8
6/20-22.5; 7/20-23.0; 9/20-23.6

Bluebell
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Mon Jun 22, 2020 11:00 am

oolala53 wrote:
Sun Jun 21, 2020 5:34 am
Bluebell! So nice to see you.

Yes, there is an amazing solidity that comes with accepting that something is your best option and that best option is actually not asking for the moon. Knowing I just could not sustain anything else ten years ago was what kept me at No S, though I sometimes added "layers" in, usually to great frustration. (You'll sometimes see me ask people who are waffling or fretting over not losing on No S, "Honestly, even if you aren't losing, what are your options? What are you going to be willing to give up, week after week, year after year?" This is why I am so popular at cocktail parties.) I am older now and have been through most of the bumpy adjustment to some mods appropriate for my age, projected healthspan, and hunger. Systematic moderation is still where it's at. I am still on my other site and have to bite my tongue so often because I keep seeing people flit from plan to plan almost weekly. People really don't like it when you say, "DIdn't you say last week that you were going to do X?"

Unless they give you permission...
Oolala - hi! :) You’ve given me so much encouragement during my NoS journey. Honestly it is humbling to come back to this forum and find support and acceptance. It is really interesting to read your thoughts after years of NoS. I do believe I am finally at a place of knowing that this is what I need to do. Even if I only ever maintain, and never get back to my ‘slim’ self, that has to be better than the endless depressing cycle of dieting, losing, giving up, bingeing, gaining, self loathing, on and on it goes and I don’t want to be on that roundabout anymore! Time to stand still and find some peace.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Mon Jun 22, 2020 11:02 am

automatedeating wrote:
Sun Jun 21, 2020 3:09 pm
I'm starting to think it might be a worthwhile experiment to just start having a super early dinner when you feel that afternoon hunger at 4ish. It has worked well for me, but probably not a good fit for everyone.
I think there’s definitely something in that approach. I guess I’ve always tried to eat with the family and maintain that sense of normality. I could try it though and see how it goes.

I did eat too much this weekend, and drank too much wine on Saturday :oops: It didn’t feel all that good. (Does it ever)

Back on track today.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

pinkhippie
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by pinkhippie » Mon Jun 22, 2020 2:59 pm

I have a really hard time at 4 pm too! It's especially hard for me because we usually eat around 5:30 so I am often cooking a meal in the midst of feeling very hungry. Some things that have worked for me are sipping a mug of tea, chewing gum, or if I am lightheaded having a small planned emergency snack. Not just eating mindlessly.

I always like eating with the family too, but recently I have been eating after they eat to have more peace at dinnertime. Eating before could be an option too..

Jen1974
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Jen1974 » Mon Jun 22, 2020 4:44 pm

I eat later breakfast & later lunch so I can eat with my family (: It has really helped me with that afternoon slump I’d always feel too! I guess it works for me though because I don’t wake up all that hungry :D

Bluebell
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Mon Jun 22, 2020 8:39 pm

Thank you pinkhippie and Jen at least I know I am not alone! I had a bit more protein at lunch today which seemed to help a bit.

Today - success
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

jenji
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Location: Cambridge

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by jenji » Wed Jun 24, 2020 8:19 pm

I like the 4:00 tea or iced tea, too. That does seem to help me get through to dinner, usually. For a while I had the modification of eating one apple a day at that time if hungry, which was the way I eased into No-S.
I'm a 49-year-old mom and non-profit CEO
I am 5' 7.5"
Began No S at 184#, BMI 28.4 - 9/25/2017
Current weight 173#, BMI 26.7 - 09/05/2019

Bluebell
Posts: 633
Joined: Thu Sep 29, 2016 7:17 pm
Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Thu Jun 25, 2020 10:39 pm

Oops haven’t posted since Monday.
Tues Weds Thurs - success. My plate was full and not healthy this evening. Of takeaway pizza :oops: This is not a regular thing for me and I managed not to snack, just took the easy option this evening.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
Posts: 633
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Sun Jun 28, 2020 10:33 pm

Well its all gone to pot a bit these last three days.
Friday was a fail, I cracked at around 4pm and had a mini binge. So annoyed with myself although I know that doesn’t achieve anything.
It carried on and I have eaten waaaay too much this weekend.
I think it has been partly driven by stepping on the scales on Friday morning to see that I hadn’t lost any weight. Which triggered those old familiar feelings of rebellion. I feel as if my old destructive habits are just lurking in the background waiting for an opportunity to rear their ugly head. I think I need to hide the scales for now and just focus on getting the habits embedded again.
Fresh start tomorrow and a whole week ahead of me to make progress.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Sun Jun 28, 2020 10:43 pm

Come back to say - it wasn't all negative, I did some fun exercise this weekend. I am the proud owner of a new mountain bike! We went as a family to our local country park where there are a couple of bike trails. I really wanted to have a go, man it was a steep climb up but I managed it! Then had the reward of zooming down the trail. Not bad going for an overweight 45 yr old :D My 16 yr old son who is a mountain biking nut and very fit, was very sweet and encouraging and stayed with us for most of the trail.
Today my husband and younger son and I went for a long walk through the beautiful countryside, it was so lovely to be out walking in the sunshine and fresh air. We were talking about how lucky we are to live so close to some amazing walks and we are keen to discover more.
I’m not saying the exercise made up for the food intake but it was good to be out and about.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

automatedeating
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by automatedeating » Sun Jun 28, 2020 11:15 pm

We were talking about how lucky we are to live so close to some amazing walks and we are keen to discover more.
This has been a common refrain in my household, too. It's wonderful to feel that gratitude surge through us for all the loveliness in the world (that we are able to easily reach).

Oh, and I'm beyond impressed at your sweet 16-year old son. Can you take my 14 year old and make him kind? :-)
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3
8/14-24.5
5/15-26.2
1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6
8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9
3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8;
3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8
6/20-22.5; 7/20-23.0; 9/20-23.6

Bluebell
Posts: 633
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Mon Jun 29, 2020 10:33 am

automatedeating wrote:
Sun Jun 28, 2020 11:15 pm
We were talking about how lucky we are to live so close to some amazing walks and we are keen to discover more.
This has been a common refrain in my household, too. It's wonderful to feel that gratitude surge through us for all the loveliness in the world (that we are able to easily reach).

Oh, and I'm beyond impressed at your sweet 16-year old son. Can you take my 14 year old and make him kind? :-)
:lol: Well I’m not saying he’s sweet all the time! But I do remember aged 13/14 being particularly awful at times. He’s coming out the other side I hope! Now I have the 11 year old to get through! :D
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

pinkhippie
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by pinkhippie » Mon Jun 29, 2020 3:14 pm

That is awesome about the mountain bike! My husband is a mountain bike addict! He goes as often as he can so apparently it must be fun or something. :D That is great that you were able to get out and do that. Be kind to yourself about your perceived mistakes. They are how we learn and as long as you keep coming back and working on the habits, they will get more solid over time. That has been my experience anyway, and I have been coming back and leaving No S for 10 years now... Every time is better.

Bluebell
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Mon Jun 29, 2020 9:44 pm

pinkhippie wrote:
Mon Jun 29, 2020 3:14 pm
That is awesome about the mountain bike! My husband is a mountain bike addict! He goes as often as he can so apparently it must be fun or something. :D That is great that you were able to get out and do that. Be kind to yourself about your perceived mistakes. They are how we learn and as long as you keep coming back and working on the habits, they will get more solid over time. That has been my experience anyway, and I have been coming back and leaving No S for 10 years now... Every time is better.
Thank you so much for your supportive words and advice. I am - still - learning to be kind to myself. I’m better than I used to be, but its still a work in progress.

Today - success

I am going to stay away from the scales for a while, they don’t actually help me whatsoever. When I did this before I weighed weekly but I can see that it just has a negative impact if I haven’t lost. I really need to focus on getting NoS done and let the weight loss follow.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

pinkhippie
Posts: 804
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by pinkhippie » Tue Jun 30, 2020 3:28 pm

I agree about not focusing on the weight and focusing on the habits. I have decided to do the same thing. It's a little scary but I think it really does help when your weight derails you. It's amazing how difficult it can be to be kind to ourselves. I think eatingl is often tied up in that, especially for women.

Congratulations on your success!

Bluebell
Posts: 633
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Tue Jun 30, 2020 8:26 pm

pinkhippie wrote:
Tue Jun 30, 2020 3:28 pm
I agree about not focusing on the weight and focusing on the habits. I have decided to do the same thing. It's a little scary but I think it really does help when your weight derails you. It's amazing how difficult it can be to be kind to ourselves. I think eatingl is often tied up in that, especially for women.

Congratulations on your success!
Yep I definitely have bad connections between food and self esteem. My mum put me on my first diet aged 12 and I think part of me is still rebelling! Good luck with avoiding the scales pinkhippie!

Today - success
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
Posts: 633
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Wed Jul 01, 2020 9:42 pm

Today - success
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

pinkhippie
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Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by pinkhippie » Wed Jul 01, 2020 11:07 pm

Oh man Bluebell! That would be rough. I didn't get put on diets, but I was praised for any weight loss, even from things like stomach flu and mono. :(

Congratulations on your success today!

Jen1974
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Location: Colorado

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Jen1974 » Thu Jul 02, 2020 4:33 pm

Bluebell: that is awful that your mom made you worry about your weight :( My kids all have gone through phases where they get “thicker” before they grown taller or as they mature. It’s part of growing up!!

Pink/Blue I’m with you both on the worrying less about weight. I haven’t weighed myself in almost 3 years :shock: I was a daily weigher & my mood was too tied to what the stupid scale said. I went camping & didn’t overdo it at all & was so proud of myself & came home to a huge jump on the scale & felt totally discouraged. It made me realize habits & self care trumped what a dumb scale said.

The funny thing coming back here I almost weighed to see if my habits were “working” but decided not to. I’m taking great care of myself & feel “thin” right now. I know “thin isn’t a feeling” but for me I feel “fat” when I’m taking terrible care of myself & “thin” when I’m taking good care of myself but it has NOTHING to do with what my weight is :D

Bluebell
Posts: 633
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Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Wed Jul 08, 2020 6:30 pm

I’ve had a terrible few days with my eating. My mother in law was taken into hospital (she’s fine but needed some tests) and I have definitely been eating from stress. I wish I had better coping mechanisms other than always turning to junk food, it never makes me feel any better. The stress came from the fact that my two sister in laws are absolutely rubbish at supporting her and so I have done my best over the years to be there for her as much as possible. She was allowed one visitor - had to be only one person due to the Covid situation- and asked if it could be me. I felt so bad as I really didn’t want to take the risk of going into the hospital even with mask on etc. I have my own parents to think about too. So I was feeling all sorts of conflicting emotions - guilt, and frustration that her own daughters wouldn’t visit. There’s a long back story. Anyway I said to her I’d rather hold off if she’s only in for a few days, she seemed to understand, and fingers crossed I will be able to bring her home tomorrow.
I managed to pull myself together today and have been successful with NoS. I really want to do the next 2 days.

Edit to say - I had a lovely solitary walk along the seafront today, we have a beach around 20 minutes drive which at low tide has beautiful white sand, it was blowing and spitting with rain but I dropped my youngest at school and went straight there for a 45 minute walk and it did me the world of good.
Last edited by Bluebell on Wed Jul 08, 2020 6:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
Posts: 633
Joined: Thu Sep 29, 2016 7:17 pm
Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Wed Jul 08, 2020 6:33 pm

Jen1974 wrote:
Thu Jul 02, 2020 4:33 pm
Bluebell: that is awful that your mom made you worry about your weight :( My kids all have gone through phases where they get “thicker” before they grown taller or as they mature. It’s part of growing up!!

Pink/Blue I’m with you both on the worrying less about weight. I haven’t weighed myself in almost 3 years :shock: I was a daily weigher & my mood was too tied to what the stupid scale said. I went camping & didn’t overdo it at all & was so proud of myself & came home to a huge jump on the scale & felt totally discouraged. It made me realize habits & self care trumped what a dumb scale said.

The funny thing coming back here I almost weighed to see if my habits were “working” but decided not to. I’m taking great care of myself & feel “thin” right now. I know “thin isn’t a feeling” but for me I feel “fat” when I’m taking terrible care of myself & “thin” when I’m taking good care of myself but it has NOTHING to do with what my weight is :D
My mum, bless her, even now in her 70s, is stuck in the diet/binge cycle. She desperately needs a knee op but keeps putting it off because she wants to lose some weight first, this has been going in for years now,
I am so impressed that you haven’t weighed in 3 years! That’s amazing! You are so right, I also use the scales to check if a diet is working, when my waistband would be a much more useful tool :D
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

Bluebell
Posts: 633
Joined: Thu Sep 29, 2016 7:17 pm
Location: Hampshire UK

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by Bluebell » Wed Jul 08, 2020 6:35 pm

pinkhippie wrote:
Wed Jul 01, 2020 11:07 pm
Oh man Bluebell! That would be rough. I didn't get put on diets, but I was praised for any weight loss, even from things like stomach flu and mono. :(

Congratulations on your success today!
Why do our parents do this to us, its so harmful in our formative years. I have tried so hard to break the cycle with my own kids and put the emphasis on moderation and exercise. They seem to be doing Ok even if I keep stumbling.
"You'll know where the North Star is &#11088;&#65039;" - Oolala

automatedeating
Posts: 5002
Joined: Sat Aug 31, 2013 2:16 pm

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by automatedeating » Wed Jul 08, 2020 9:46 pm

hang in there, Bluebell. So sorry to hear about your MIL and all the associated stress with that situation. I just loved hearing that you got yourself outside and to the lovely (if windy and rainy!) beach for a soul-cleansing walk.
Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3
8/14-24.5
5/15-26.2
1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6
8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9
3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18-23.8;
3/19-22.1; 10/19-21.8
6/20-22.5; 7/20-23.0; 9/20-23.6

pinkhippie
Posts: 804
Joined: Wed Mar 17, 2010 8:00 pm

Re: Bluebell's check in

Post by pinkhippie » Wed Jul 08, 2020 10:42 pm

Bluebell wrote:
Wed Jul 08, 2020 6:35 pm


Why do our parents do this to us, its so harmful in our formative years. I have tried so hard to break the cycle with my own kids and put the emphasis on moderation and exercise. They seem to be doing Ok even if I keep stumbling.
I know, I have worked really hard on not doing that with my kids as well. It has definitely been challenging sometimes.

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