frustrated!!

No Snacks, no sweets, no seconds. Except on Days that start with S. Too simple for you? Simple is why it works. Look here for questions, introductions, support, success stories.

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lilguysmama
Posts: 33
Joined: Thu Apr 22, 2010 5:38 pm
Location: SC

frustrated!!

Post by lilguysmama » Mon Feb 13, 2012 9:54 pm

Getting so frustrated with all this dieting stuff. Thinking about going back to WW but my mind just keeps on coming back to this one. I this one would be soooooo much cheaper, but I have a really hard time losing weight on my own. Im a big emotional eatter. And lately its been worse then ever. Im pretty much a single mom 4-5 days out of the week to a 3 yr old boy. I try to exercise to my dvds but he just wont let me, he's always holding on to me or clawing between my legs.
I dont like to cook, expecially when it just the two of us.
I just need help with this, I need to lose this weight, getting really frustrated, any help or advice is appreciated.

wosnes
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Joined: Mon Sep 18, 2006 3:38 pm
Location: Indianapolis, IN, USA

Post by wosnes » Tue Feb 14, 2012 12:03 am

Well, no one said it would be easy!

When your son bothers you while exercising, calmly set him down, tell him you will be done in a little bit and you'll play (or whatever) with him then. Then go back to exercising. Repeat as necessary. This may happen a dozen times while you're trying to exercise and it may take a week or more for him to get the idea, but if you're consistent, he'll get the idea. Remember, you're the boss. This can also be his time to play with some special toy -- but ONLY when you're exercising.

Keep your meals simple and something YOU like.
"That which we persist in doing becomes easier for us to do. Not that the nature of the thing itself has changed but our power to do it is increased." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"You are what you eat -- so don't be Fast, Easy, Cheap or Fake."

oolala53
Posts: 10059
Joined: Mon Oct 06, 2008 1:46 am
Location: San Diego, CA USA

Post by oolala53 » Tue Feb 14, 2012 3:34 am

All this dieting stuff? What dieting stuff? Just eat three meals a day without sweets. That is not dieting. That is living and feeding yourself moderately and appropriately. It simplifies your life because it doesn't revolve around eating all day long.

How many people does it take to cook for? I'm only one and I cook for myself. I'm not sure how complicated you think the cooking has to be. Cereal, fruit, nuts at breakfast. That's not even cooking. That is assembling. Sandwich, raw veggies, fruit at lunch. Easy. I might bake a lot of chicken at one time, cook a lot of grain at once, and have frozen veggies on hand, for examples. These I would have for dinner. Your son will benefit from you both having proper meals, though they can be simple.

Why would you be willing to do more prep or whatever you'd need if you were on WW? How can that possibly be easier than this? Why would you be willing to curb your emotional eating any more when you were tracking your food than when all you have to do is have three meals a day? You will eliminate a lot of emotional eating by eating meals and not snacking. The urges to eat emotionally will likely not go away until you start ignoring them. The way you can be strong enough to say no to them is have proper meals. Then when the desire for food comes in an hour or two or three, you can remind yourself that you just ate a few hours ago and you don't need food right then. Have a plan for the next meal--remember, simple-- and remind yourself you will be eating again in an hour or two. Have some milk, if you're hungry. If you afraid of making your son wait so long, have fruit or nuts for him. But even he should have a few hours between eating events.

Eating all the time is a HABIT, not a necessity. If you don't go through the process of weaning yourself off the habit, you won't get to find out how good you will feel. But it won't happen in a day or a week.

BTW, I would think rolling around on the floor playing with your son would be pretty good exercise.
Last edited by oolala53 on Wed Feb 15, 2012 11:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

Too solid flesh
Posts: 639
Joined: Wed Jan 17, 2007 5:22 pm
Location: England

Post by Too solid flesh » Wed Feb 15, 2012 2:53 pm

Might it be possible for you and your son to do some physical activities together, as a game for him, with a side benefit of exercise for you? Activities such as walking to a nearby playground (if there is one) and racing around after him as he clambers, playing chase, dancing to music together for fifteen minutes, etc. It sounds as though less formal activities might work better for you both at the moment than an exercise DVD.

Or doing exercises without a DVD and encouraging him to do the exercises with you might work - I can remember doing my mother's post-operative exercises with her when I was three or four.

I'm sure you're already familiar with the Let's Move programme:

http://www.letsmove.gov/get-active

Good luck with this.
Be kind, for everybody you meet is fighting a hard battle.

harmony
Posts: 268
Joined: Sat Jul 18, 2009 4:29 pm
Location: MN

Post by harmony » Thu Feb 16, 2012 7:35 am

It's been a few years, but when my son was young and kind of clingy and I wanted to exercise, I would pop in a tape of The Wiggles and we would dance along together to the songs. Quite a few times it ended up as me doing the dancing while holding him, but I thought of it as weight training. I had incredibly strong arms back then. :) The Wiggles always had these goofy choreographed dance routines that went with the songs (especially in their earlier less sophisticated videos). It was kind of like goofy aerobics. lol. Wiggles videos aren't as common anymore, but sometimes I see them in the bargain bins. I haven't checked, but maybe they can be found on Netflix. It probably won't give you buns of steel, but it will keep you moving and you might even look forward to it.

If you have a Wii, I also noticed that they have a Just Dance Kids game that might work even better. I might consider this one for myself. I really need to move more, my daughter (5) loves the Wii, she loves to dance, and I don't mind dancing to kid songs. It seems like a good fit. lol.

I understand the feeling of just not wanting to cook. I remind myself at those times that the important part is to have a meal even if it isn't ideal. In my ideal world I would have the time and energy and money to cook everything from scratch using fresh ingredients, but it doesn't happen that way. Plus, I have found when I am most consistent with No-S I tend to run into apathetic spells where I lose all inspiration when it comes to meal planning or wanting to put much effort into meals. It can really be a challenge.

But, even when you don't like to cook, one tends to still eat. Put what you've been eating on a plate and call it a meal. It's a start. Unfortunately, I have found from experience that a meal of snack food usually doesn't hold you to the next meal very well (or fit all that well on a plate. lol). I have tried cooking bulk meals in advance and it doesn't work well for me, but having some quick, easy recipes that were scaled down to avoid leftovers did. When I found myself alone with two young kids that didn't eat much (my husband was deployed for nearly 2 years), I found some Dinner for Two cookbooks that had simple recipes in them that I could also feed my children (which included my 3yo daughter at the time). I liked eating freshly prepared food and not having to deal with a lot of waste or left-overs. Also during that time, I tried not to beat myself up for resorting to convenience foods - frozen, canned, boxed entrees, etc. My meals weren't perfect, but they were meals and it all went toward really cementing the habit of having a sit down meal at dinner with my family - and forming the habits of having set mealtimes is very No-S. (and I did manage to follow No-S and lose a pants size during the later part of this time.)

Recently, I found myself in a similar boat (dinner alone with the kids more nights than not) and was also in one of my really apathetic non-cooking modes. The budget was tight, I was tired, overwhelmed, and I dreaded dinnertime. I had started snacking non-stop. I decided to make a set schedule for what I would make each night. The meals had to be super easy, fast, kid-friendly, budget- friendly, and flexible so that I could add some variety to them if needed. So now we have pasta on Monday, soup and sandwich on Tuesday, Breakfast for dinner on Wednesday, hamburger casserole on Thursday, and pizza on Friday. It really helped me get the meals on the table and the kids actually really like it. Plus it makes grocery shopping so much easier. Sometimes when I am in a cooking mode, I go all out and do something special. But, I have back up convenience options for most nights (canned soup, frozen pizzas, Bisquick, canned spaghetti sauce, etc.). Plus, most of these meals are easily adjusted to larger portions when my husband actually makes it home for dinner with us.

Anyway, those are a few things I figured out when I was in a similar situation. I hope you can figure out a good solution that works for you. I totally understand your frustration right now.

oolala53
Posts: 10059
Joined: Mon Oct 06, 2008 1:46 am
Location: San Diego, CA USA

Post by oolala53 » Sun Feb 19, 2012 8:48 pm

It may not have sounded like it before, but I agree with harmony a lot. When I said to have proper meals, I just meant don't resort to cheese and crackers all the time. Put the food on a plate, sit down, and enjoy.

I will often get a fast food burrito (live in SoCal) on the way home from work. Divide it in half, add frozen veggies and a piece of fruit. Dinner. And most of lunch the next day, too. A piece of pizza at Costco, plus veggies and fruit. Etc. Just try to have easy veggies and fruit on hand, along with easy entrees.
Count plates, not calories. 11 years "during"
Age 69
BMI Jan/10-30.8
1/12-26.8 3/13-24.9 +/- 8-lb. 3 yrs
9/17 22.8 (flux) 3/18 22.2
2 yrs flux 6/20 22
1/21-23

There is no S better than Vanilla No S (mods now as a senior citizen)

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