Everyday Systems

205.8

206.4

vacation. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

207.4

I just scanned through your whole history. I have to say that it breaks my heart that you still feel so fat. You've maintained a loss of about 22% of your weight for quite awhile now. That is a real feat. And you've had plenty of slips along the way without quitting. Plus, you have a very impressive history of consistent walking, if you look at the big picture. Even if you miss 6 days every single month, you still walk 80% of the days of the year. Do you have any idea how FEW people in the States can claim such a record of consistent activity? Do you know that THAT is much more correlated with longevity than weight is? And with lower incidence of dementia?

And the change in what you eat is laudable. You eat so much better! I know you keep focusing on when you eat the "wrong" stuff, but compared to how you started, it's amazing! You cook!

I'm curious. Does your doctor say you have to get to a normal BMI? Because as far as I know, most obesity specialists would be ecstatic with your results.

I know this is such a tough culture to try to have respect for bodies that are not excessively thin. But you definitely deserve to. You might be heavier than your age/height peers, but you are tougher than most of them, by golly. You are fitter and you've done what few in any age group can do. You've maintained a weight loss of more than 30 lbs. for more than a year. You should apply to be in the National Weight Loss Registry. Really! YOU ARE A WEIGHT LOSS SUCCESS RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE! And recognizing that isn't necessarily going to keep you from losing more. It might even inspire you. I felt like a success to some degree the whole way down. I still sometimes bemoan the fact that for a lot of women, I am at a "before" weight, but I do recognize that I've still achieved a lot. I'm not going to let an Insanity ad or "professional beauties" in the media dictate my vitality.

With all due respect to your mom, she is way off in holding out on you because you don't fit some image. And I gently say that you are following in her footsteps because it sounds like you keep judging yourself for not losing the 50 lbs. you keep talking about instead of the 55-60 you have. Don't play her game!

I wonder, do you FEEL any different in terms of true hunger and satiety on days you eat three moderate meals? Could that physical feeling- not the moral one- be a bit more of a touchstone for you rather than the scale?

And have you ever thought of working up to an added 14-minute vigorous workout along the lines of Shovelglove? Wall pushouts, sitting down and getting up repeatedly, swinging a heavy pot around, etc. You could start with 4 minutes, alternating 30-second intervals. Even 4 minutes for three months would likely make you feel different. I know when I do something like that consistently, I feel peppier and I more easily eat to feel peppier, which is eating more freggies and less dense food.

Anyway, I feel sheepish even saying these things because you have already shown such amazing tenacity that you should be feeling pretty darn victorious, rather than holding it over your head that you haven't gotten below 200. According to my same age/height peers, I shouldn't be happy until I lose 16 more pounds. Should I agree with them and keep lamenting that I don't live the way I would need to to get there?

I know you haven't talked here about non-No S stuff much, but I'd like to know sometime, if you're willing to share, some of the things in life that tickle you. What do you enjoy? Do you like certain TV programs? Books? Magazines? It doesn't have to be anything impressive. Try not to let this weight thing define you. If you lived in another culture or in another time, it wouldn't even be an issue.

You are so much more than your weight and your eating!

However, regarding health issues, I affirm for you the courage and determination to make changes that are recommended to you, even if they are tough. I have a friend on another board to manage binge eating who uses No S with mods for health reasons, and has for well more than a year. She had already lost some weight, almost eliminated bingeing, but now loves the routine of three meals, lost a bit more, and is rather steady now with a rather rigorous exercise regime that she has also kept up for years. She limits certain foods at some meals according to recommendations from a nutritionist, who is very pleased with her results. But she is not skinny.

You are an inspiration!

oolala - thank you so much. you are a wonderful writer and your words are such an inspiration. For the first time, I went into the urgent care for some medicine, and the dr. actually shocked me, I always start my dr. visit by apologizing for being fat and letting them know I am working toward goal, etc, because I always know the lecture is coming. But this dr. - when I told him my goal weight was 150 he said, no you are big boned, you would look funny at 150, that is too low. you should aim for 175 or 180. that is the first time i received such a reaction. because 150 is at the very very high end of my bmi, i am a 5'5" female. so there you go, even the medical field doesn't always concur

Even though my weight is a big issue for me, in terms of feeling like a woman and health and family pressures. I have many interests and talents, even though I am fat, based on what I feel and what others have told me

I have a pretty face
I have lovely hair
I have pretty eyes
I am educated
I have been a teacher for 12 years in a very tough neighborhood
I have a career and masters degree
I make people laugh and am very social
I work hard, own my own home
I am Polish, have traveled throughout Europe, and speak Polish fluently
I love dogs
I had a happy childhood and many relatives that loved me
I love to read
I love PBS
I love classic British Literature
I am a very good cook
I have a good sense of humor
I do well in almost any social situation, with many different types of people

So why does my weight occupy so much of my brain................

206.2

vacation is here time to start walking again

walked my 4 miles, check

What a fantastic list of attributes! So nice to meet this version of you, joasia!

Did you say you visited Big Bear Lake somewhere on this thread?

BTW, I live in San Diego.

I live in redlands. Which is on the way to big bear. Yes I've been to big bear

I just got home from traveling, where quick entries was all I could manage. I took such joy reading your list, joasia!! What a neat and admirable list of wonderful traits!

I grew up mostly in San Bernardino and returned to the area after living several years overseas. Redlands was the last community I lived in before I moved to San Diego in Dec. of 1980. It's the gem of the Inland Empire, IMO.

206.6

REALLY really trying not to be frustrated with the fact that number and that it is not moving. 5 mile walk yesterday.



ANYWAY

yes I grew up in Redlands. Really like this town. Love San Diego too.

Stupid scale, throw that thing in the garbage as a Christmas present to yourself.

205 point something

no walk

christmas food

206.2

not bad after all that food

207

walked 4 miles

I think I am going to have to go back to counting points. I am stuck at this weight walking 4 miles and I don't feel like I am overeating. I still have 50 pounds to lose and nothing is happening. I have been stuck for months now. I hate weighing and measuring food, but I know it is the only way the scale will start moving down again. ugh, that is life

Hi Joasia,
Your check in doesn't always make it clear to me if you had a "green" or "red" day. Also, it looks like you have not been walking daily....maybe once or twice a week?

So, look back over your checkins/habitcal or whatever you track your habit with..... have you had more than a few reds each month? Have you walked 4X/week (or more) since your walking buddy passed away?

Getting stricter by counting points may be what you want to do, but before you do it, I'd like to know how "red" or "green" your eating and exercise have been.

Maybe you could write "green" or "red" or "S" day at the top of each entry.

Citizen's arrest from the thought police:

I noticed you said this of yourself, "I have many interests and talents, even though I am fat."

Would you ever say that about anyone else but yourself? Oh, yes, my best friend is so nice and interesting, even though she's fat." Ouch!! I think if we're taking away snacks and sweets and seconds, we must replace them with kindness, to start. You deserve it. We all deserve it. How about

"I have many interests and talents, and I have a wonderful body that takes me where I want to go."

205.6

206.4

204.4

It is gone down because of the juice fast I am doing not because of nos, but I posted anyway

203.4

I think I see a new low -- Happy New Year, joasia! Hope 2014 is all you could wish!

Hi Joasia,

The weight seems to go down but much more importantly: you seem to be a fantastic person all of us on your check-in thread would like to hang out with so isn't that more important?

Well done!

205.4
I am trying not to be frustrated. But I hate this maintaining.

joasia,
I will leave you alone about this question after I ask one more time!
So you are being near-perfect compliant on NoS and your walking? The answer will just help me know how to encourage you (even if me asking the question is purely annoying).

joasia, fluctuations and maintaining rather than losing can be so frustrating, but I want to encourage you to keep at it and to remind you that you are more than a number on the scale, than the size on clothing tags, than what you think of yourself when you're feeling discouraged. If you need more specific reminding, please refer back to your reply posts from Dec. 22. You're amazing!

I'm in the wanting to hang out with joasia boat too!!! I think you are just awesome and love seeing your posts. 2014 is YOUR year. I just know it!

205.6

205.6

walked 4 miles yesterday, but ate too much, including candy and chex mix, struggling with over eating still, but not giving up, going for 4 miles right now

really didn't feel like walking, but I cranked it out, onward and upward

206.2

I can do this even if it's hard

Yes, that's for sure!

204.4

did a juice fast yesterday

201.6

Now before I get excited, I think it is just a fluke because yesterday was a regular day

B = one plate tortilla chips, guacamole, cheese dip, salsa, didn't finish plate

L = 1/2 a philly cheese steak sandwich, snacked a little on the steak and cheese while making the sandwich, just a little

S = candy, gummy bears, skittles, licorice

D = 2 ground beef tacos, rice, and beans

so you see not the best eating day

4 mile walk
drinks

Yes, joasia, make sure you never get excited.
I'll get excited for you! That is a definite low-fluctation! See, you can call it a fluctuation and then it's not like you're counting on it staying there! But in the meantime, you can still be "excited".

Oh and I forgot, I had a little thai food at parents house yesterday, bowl of noodle soup and a few spoons of fried rice and noodles and shrimp

sooooooooooooo, I admit, I just got scale crazy for a minute and weighed myself 5 more times, it varied

202.4, 201.2 ok enough of that now

thank you automatedeating, you are always so sweet to me

201! Joasia, when I was low carbing and weighing daily, there was a kind of pattern -- I'd hit a new low and feel triumph, then the next day it would be two or three pounds up (despair), then maybe a week or two of up-and-down for no discernible reason (frustration), then suddenly the low would be the new normal (ho hum) and my sights would be fixed on the next new low. Sound familiar??

When I started following your thread, you were 212-ish (about where I am now) -- you're losing sight of the larger arc of your steady progress by letting all those little frustrations rule your days! Get excited! That new number will be the norm before you know it!

Hi Josia, I completely agree with JW. I thought a lot that my weight would never crawl down but it eventually did NoS is very slow paced at times, which I also struggle with but it does eventually get you there with side-benefits of happiness, health, and life-long-doability

Great to see you hanging in there! And it is producing REAL results! You inspire me.....

you guys are the best. thank you so much. i really need those thoughts. I know I should stop weighing everyday, but I just can't. just went on a two day vacation, numbers are up again. but hopefully, one day, 201 will be the new norm, thank you everyone for the countless words of encouragement and not giving up on me when I feel that everyone should give up on me

205.8

haven't been walking or eating well, need to get back on track

205.6

walked 4 miles
eating wasn't great

my walks have been in the rain every day this week! Windy too. icky weather here, hope yours is nicer!

we have had a california winter, sunny and 70s everyday, would like some rain so that it would feel like winter

Just look at the pictures on the news about all this crazy cold weather to know it's winter.

Did you know Niagara Falls is partially frozen right now? Wow!

yeah, I have friends in Maryland and they have been telling me how cold it is

204.8
short walk

204.6

Looks like the scale is going in the right direction--yay!

Linda

205.2

I can do this, just because I have been stuck for a while does not mean I will be stuck forever

right!

203.2-202.6

no walk


ate weird

bite of cake, 1/2 of a brc burrito with salsa,

203

no walk, didn't eat a lot, but not healthy stuff either

B = mcdonalds egg, ham, and cheese english muffin, hash brown, oj, ketchup

L = none

D = 1/2 pastrami sandwich, some fries, bite of a burger, few bites of cake, drinks

I think that is it

204.6

don't even know why I keep posting here, I am beyond frustrated

Well, one reason to keep posting here is because I like to see your posts!

You have gone down 5-6 pounds since August, you know. That's about a pound a month. Very sustainable. Slow and steady wins the race.

thank you automate, you are always so sweet - I feel like I have to eat very little to see any difference in weight, just frustrating

203

no walk
ate very little

S days are here!

202.2

Nice number!

You're moving in the right direction, joasia. Patience!

Hope you are practicing eating slowly, chewing a lot, and enjoying your meals. I know it's not specific to No S, but it's helped me a lot over the years. That and increasing the freggies while I slowly reduced the volume of denser foods. It makes the meals last longer and I honestly prefer the range of textures now.

201.8

Am I happy with this number? Totally. But...............here is what the problem is. I am going to be very honest. I believe one of the goals of no s is to achieve sanity with food and eating in general. I have not been very sane with my eating. I have not really been nosing. I have been eating very little. Skipping meals, etc. So, although I am very happy with the number, I don't think I achieved it in a very no s way. My goal of reaching food sanity has not been achieved. Which means - I don't know if I can sustain this. And that frightens me. I hope the numbers will continue downward, but I also hope that they do so while I form healthy and sane habits with my eating habits. I haven't been walking either.

So are you fighting a lot of hunger?

I don't know how much of it is hunger and how much of it is I want to eat because it tastes good and it is comforting. Today I walked and have been eating clean. I am trying to aim for eating whole foods instead of processed. But it is a challenge. When i am stressed and hungry, I want to reach for the comfort stuff: pizza, cheese, more cheese, mexican, pasta, cheese. I won't eliminate these foods totally, but have them less often and focus on fruits, veges, beans, nuts, etc. the healthy stuff. hopefully this will help with my health and weight. But it's not easy.

I hope you eat the comfort food sometimes, joasia -- otherwise, it becomes this unattainable mirage! when really, it's just pizza. It sounds like your diet is very healthful overall.

Hiya, I agree witih JW.

Also, do you drink enough still water? I find I feel really hungy when I don't drink enough water. Sparkling works too actually. It will fill you up a bit. (Sorry, I didn't read the entire thread in case this was discussed already).

201.4

walked 4 miles, ate well all day, except at dinner, but still moving in the right direction, i want to not weigh myself for a week, but I don't know if I can go that long

yes, I have been drinking a lot of water.

200.2

ate well for breakfast and lunch, not so well at dinner

no walk

Not sure what you're doing, but you seem to be killing it! Hopefully you're not starving . You inspire me!

i have been eating whole foods, or trying to. less meat and cheese and more healthy fats like nuts and avocado. I do well until dinner time - then i get cravings for junk

B = nutribullet smoothie kale, broccoli, 1 cup blueberries, celery
1 oz. nuts, one orange

L = one slice of toast with avocado, homemade lentil soup

etc.

B = smoothie: broccoli, kale, celery, 1 cup blueberries, 1oz nuts

L = 5 prunes, one slice of toast, 2 oz. avocado

D = one orange, 1 cup lentil and vegetable soup, one slice toast, one hard boiled egg, I think that is it

no alcohol
walked 4 miles

your food sounds yummy to me. I love avocado on toast!!!

200.8, then later this morning 200, then 199.4

I saw it. If only for a second, I saw it. Maybe it was a mirage, but I saw it, and I almost cried

YEAH!!! You're getting there.

Oh, my! Soon it will be the new normal! Well done, joasia!

I haven't seen 199 in years. I still have 50 pounds to go. My BMI still says that I am in the obese category. But, I don't weigh 268.5 pounds anymore. I can walk 4 or 5 miles without my legs cramping up and shin splints every few minutes and having to sit down. I can stand for longer periods of time without my feet being sore. I don't have 3 chins anymore. I can look at myself in the mirror naked without running and screaming. A towel fits around me again. My legs don't swell up at the end of the day. I am not always sitting on the couch with a pillow on my lap trying to cover my enormous stomach. My clothes are starting to fall off of me. I can wash myself in the shower and I can reach where I need to. There are so many other things too. I am not at goal yet, I have a long ways to go still, but I have made a lot of progress.

I have had to change my nosdiet as well. When I first started, I ate everything, fast food, junk, etc. but kept it to three meals, most of the time. Now that I have less to lose, I found that I can't eat junk everyday. So, I am trying to eat clean whole foods, most days, and save junk food for once in a while. I had to do this for health and to get the scale moving down again, after a long period of maintaining.

joasia, you are beginning to sound like a new woman! I think NoS is great for your self-esteem, not just your weight loss!

You're sounding so positive that I might not be able to call you my "favorite Eeyore" anymore.

Yay!

Josia,

How beautiful is that? Your achievements are amazing - you can be immensely proud of yourself!

I'm curious. Is wanting to lose more weight the only reason you don't want to eat junk food as much anymore? Do you feel the same when you eat it as when you don't?

202.8
going to try to go back down to 199
haven't been walking. I need to eat healthier for health reasons, it is a work in progress

doing ok so far today, I can do it! I will not have a bad afternoon eating wise, and my goal is to walk

Hi Joasia,
Good job with the positive self-talk. Hope you got that walk in!

Failed. Badly. I am so unhappy at work and it is not helping my weight loss efforts. But I feel so stuck

When things are hard, I think we have choices

we can face reality, even if it is uncomfortable, and choose to take difficult, yet in the end rewarding, steps to change it

or we can escape, of which there are many forms

the escape feels good, much better than facing the reality, but in the end it is just that, an escape, and when we are done escaping, the unhappiness of the ugly reality still remains, and nothing changes to remedy the situation or make it better

I know what I must do to make this better, that doesn't mean it will be easy or pleasant, but I have overcome other difficult things in my life, and this is no different

I can and I will, one day at a time

and at the end of the struggle, I will feel better for doing what is difficult but necessary

I just need to find a support system and stop escaping

Good Morning Joasia!
I just spent a few minutes browsing through your thread. What an inspiration you are!! Truly! I am so glad I stopped by. Your consistency is inspiring.

So sorry you are so unhappy at work! Are the changes you are talking about needing to make referring to your work situation?? Or your weight loss journey? So true what you are saying true change is so much more difficult than escape, but in the end after the grueling effort so much sweeter. Good luck!! Hope today is a better day!

Oh...and I am sure the folks on this board will be happy to be a support system for you....as much as we are able!!

Joasia, you can and you will! You are very tenacious and have all the will you need to make change happen, I am sure!

I think it is a bad sign when I spend my lunch break crying at my desk. I really hate my job

Oh, joasia, that is heartbreaking! I surely hope you can find a job that is fulfilling and satisfying.

Is the job issue just the present situation (boss, colleagues) or is it the whole career?

Not sure how old you are or what kind of budget you have to make changes, but it is worth researching.

If you think the career area is a mismatch, I highly recommend the testing done by the Johnson O'Connor Research Foundation. (The only standardized testing recommended by Richard Nelson Bolles, the father of career search techniques and the author of What Color is Your Parachute?) Unfortunately, I did not follow the advice given to me by them 25 years ago, but I was also impaired by having absolutely no savings or means to pursue their suggestions at the time. They certainly foretold that I would not be happy in the work I did choose and why, but I thought I would get involved in it only a few years. Despite my lack of follow-through, I still am glad I spent the money and found out the results. The closest testing site is Los Angeles. http://www.jocrf.org/

No matter what the work situation, it's not worth eating over.

Here's a pretty good article about the battery of tests.

http://www.oprah.com/money/Aptitude-Tes ... -For-You/1