VM's "Oops" Negative Accountability

Counting carbs/calories is a drag. Obsessive scale stepping is a recipe for despair. If you want to count something, "days on habit" is a much better metric. Checking off days on a calendar would do just fine, but if you do it here you get accountability and support. Here's how. Start a new topic in this forum called (say) "Your Name Daily Check In." Then every N day post a "reply" to that topic as to whether you stayed on habit. A simple "<font color="green">SUCCESS</font>" or "<font color="red">FAILURE</font>" (or your preferred euphemism if that's too harsh) is sufficient, but obviously you're welcome to write more if you want. On S-days just register that you're taking an S-day. You don't have to do this forever, just until you're confident you've built the habit. Feel free to check in weekly or monthly or sporadically instead of daily. Feel free also to track other habits besides No-s (I'm keeping this forum under No-s because that's what the vast majority are using it for). See also my <a href="/habitcal/">HabitCal</a> tool for another more formal (and perhaps complementary) way to track habits.

Moderators: Soprano, automatedeating

Post Reply
vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

VM's "Oops" Negative Accountability

Post by vmsurbat » Wed Mar 07, 2012 7:47 pm

Inspired by Reinhard's newest podcast, this is not so much a daily check-in as a place to quantify/qualify a red day. I've been pretty successful with NoS since the very beginning (3+ years ago), but still have a red day every week--usually something quite small, rarely a "major" fail, but still....I'd like to strengthen my good habits even more. I think this "negative" accountability just might do the trick.

3/7/12: No fail, just documenting the start of this thread.
3/10: Oops! Mindlessly dipped a potato chip into the ranch dip after lunch, while clearing the table. Stopped at just one, though.
3/13: Oops! Scraped the pan with the crispy Parmesan cheese bits while sitting around the table, talking, but the meal was over, so a technical red.
3/14: Pi Day! Had piece of pie in honor of the day (math class!) but in my heart, I don't really consider it a true S day.
3/19: Enjoyed 3 dark-chocolate covered almonds mid-afternoon. Almost the last of a Christmas present. Not terrible, but not vanilla NoS.
3/20: Small second serving at dinner.
Life note: We have long-term guests staying with us and there is a learning curve to figuring out the amount of food needed to serve us at each meal. Consequently, I've been taking smaller (for me) servings, wanting to make sure our guests have enough. But temptation for seconds looms large when there is still some in the bowl and I would have taken a larger serving in the first place. Hopefully I will soon have mealtime amounts figured out as I do lousy with virtual plating of my meals--I always overeat in such instances.
3/27: Several sandwich cookies for lunch when unexpected visitors stayed for lunch.
Life Note: Two weeks in and getting much better at estimating the right amount of food to prepare now that we've expanded the household by 100% for the next few months...
3/28: Ate one cookie at the home of a neighbor. Couldn't refuse without hurting feelings.
3/29: Sigh. Special dessert made for our family by a visiting guest. Understandable, but not NoS compliant. 3 days in a row is a bit frustrating. Having company definitely complicates things....
4/4: Took a piece of the homemade candied orange peel I was offering a guest. Not a biggie, but not compliance either.
4/12: Virtual plated dinner--ugh! Even though it *seemed* like a smallish amount overall, I ended up eating too much and felt slightly sick later. I really must stick with one appropriately-filled plate regardless of "how it might look to others" at a buffet when people expect you to take multiple small servings.
4/24: More Virtual plating--this is really my downfall. I'm not gaining weight (and since I don't have much to lose anymore, I've not been losing at any great rate) but still, I feel like my habits are derailing--more "diethead chatter" than in a long time. One=done is SO FREEING.
5/03: With a long stretch between lunch and dinner due to an evening meeting, I opted for a glass of milk (legal) but then snitched the one lonely roasted asparagus leftover from a previous meal. Again, not a biggie calorie-wise/healthwise, but a disappointment in keeping habits.
5/17: A neighbor brought over some apple strudel, still warm from the oven. I ate some, so a fail. Again, it was just a few bites, so no weight-control damage. But...not strict NoS compliance. And that is what THIS thread is all about.....
5/22: Ate a cookie while having coffee with a friend.
5/26: Took an extra piece of pizza. No excuse, just did it. :(
6/07: Had a guest over, put out peanuts and fruit for him, but ate some (too much!) myself. A true WTH moment.
06/13: While cleaning up after dinner, snitched a dried fig off the plate. Ooops!
Last edited by vmsurbat on Wed Jun 13, 2012 7:16 pm, edited 19 times in total.
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

mcs
Posts: 26
Joined: Sun Feb 26, 2012 4:40 pm

Post by mcs » Thu Mar 08, 2012 1:57 am

Wow! 3 years? I'm on week two. Has it done what it's supposed to do?

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Sat Mar 10, 2012 9:26 pm

mcs wrote:Wow! 3 years? I'm on week two. Has it done what it's supposed to do?
YES! I'm down 50 pounds despite being an older (50+), short (5'2"), hypothroidal woman.

I've had my best success following "vanilla" NoS with no real mods. I only differ in that my S days are Friday and Sunday because right from the very beginning those were our family's Special days....and still are.

You can see my testimonial in the testimonial board. I have one for each year of NoS.... I'm now within normal bmi and still slowly losing. :)

HTH,
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

KL
Posts: 265
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2012 7:25 pm

Post by KL » Sun Mar 11, 2012 12:15 pm

This is so inspiring for those of us just starting out - day 11 for me.

Great job in keeping it fresh and clean.
"Everything is permissible for me - but not everything is beneficial...I will not be mastered by anything." 1 Cor 6:12

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Thu Mar 15, 2012 11:34 am

3/14: Pi Day! Had piece of pie in honor of the day (math class!) but in my heart, I don't really consider it a true S day.
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

CMThib82
Posts: 113
Joined: Wed Feb 29, 2012 11:24 pm

Post by CMThib82 » Thu Mar 15, 2012 12:47 pm

Very inspirational!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Tue Mar 20, 2012 6:48 am

3/19: Enjoyed 3 dark-chocolate covered almonds mid-afternoon. Almost the last of a Christmas present. Not terrible, but not vanilla NoS.
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Thu Mar 22, 2012 10:41 am

3/20: Small second serving at dinner.
Life note: We have long-term guests staying with us and there is a learning curve to figuring out the amount of food needed to serve us at each meal. Consequently, I've been taking smaller (for me) servings, wanting to make sure our guests have enough. But temptation for seconds looms large when there is still some in the bowl and I would have taken a larger serving in the first place. Hopefully I will soon have mealtime amounts figured out as I do lousy with virtual plating of my meals--I always overeat in such instances.
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Tue Mar 27, 2012 6:59 pm

3/27: Several sandwich cookies for lunch when unexpected visitors stayed for lunch.
Life Note: Two weeks in and getting much better at estimating the right amount of food to prepare now that we've expanded the household by 100% for the next few months...
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Thu Mar 29, 2012 9:54 am

3/28: Ate one cookie at the home of a neighbor. Couldn't refuse without hurting feelings.
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Thu Mar 29, 2012 8:50 pm

3/29: Sigh. Special dessert made for our family by a visiting guest. Understandable, but not NoS compliant. 3 days in a row is a bit frustrating. Having company definitely complicates things....
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Sat Mar 31, 2012 8:50 pm

3/31: Had one chocolate chip cookie along with our guests. Next time I shouldn't put out more than one per guest. Too tempting.
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

User avatar
NoSnacker
Posts: 1481
Joined: Sat Jun 11, 2011 12:40 am
Location: Buffalo, New York

Post by NoSnacker » Mon Apr 02, 2012 9:14 am

Wow, love to see you lost all that weight and even with an occasional minor red days you are still losing..

Hope to be there some day.

Did you change the kinds of foods you eat as well during the 3 years?
Age 56: SBMI=30.6 (12/1/13) CBMI 28.9 (2/2/14) GBMI-24.8

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Thu Apr 05, 2012 7:33 am

4/4: Took a piece of the homemade candied orange peel I was offering a guest. Not a biggie, but not compliance either.
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Thu Apr 05, 2012 7:50 am

NoSnacker wrote:

Did you change the kinds of foods you eat as well during the 3 years?
No, I didn't at the beginning at all. I focused on eating the food I like/love while trying to stay strictly with the rules. That meant I ate burgers, tacos, nachos, chips, french fries on N days, plus things like pork chops, chicken, and salads. BUT, I tried to eat everything sensibly--not a huge plate of nothing but fries and burgers, but a burger with a moderate side of fries. The knowledge that I could have that *every* day if I wanted was very freeing for me and helped me not to stuff myself/reward myself with food. It also helped me to learn how much I really wanted--not as a mind game ("Oooh, I can eat a whole plate of fries now" -- which, when you think of it, can be pretty disgusting) but as a healthy (mind and body) response: ("Mmmm, two tacos really fills me up; I don't NEED to eat three just because I can fit them on plate.")

Over the *years* my eating style has changed. I went from eating dessert 4 times (lunch and dinner on both S days), to eating one light dessert (ie. cookie) and one moderate dessert (ie. apple pie slice) each weekend--and not even that always. Any more than that feels too rich and uncomfortable. I find it much less tempting to overload my plate because I *know* that I won't feel good by the time I'm done. Because I no longer fool myself into thinking I will have fruit as a snack (pre NoS thinking), I plan for it as part of my meals and consequently, am eating more fruit more regularly than ever in my life. I can really enjoy its natural sweetness at the end of a meal (N day or S day). Also, because (over time) I've found that large servings of meat/potatoes leaves me stuffed, but I still like full plates, I've taken to more conscientiously filling half my plate with veggies/salad/fruit. That way I get a full bountiful plate to enjoy and still feel good after!

But, to summarize, I didn't change the foods I ate when I started NoS, but NoS habits have slowly changed the foods/amounts I most enjoy.

HTH,
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

r.jean
Posts: 1653
Joined: Fri Dec 24, 2010 7:47 pm
Location: Midwest

Post by r.jean » Thu Apr 05, 2012 8:13 am

I experienced similar, gradual changes. You describe it well.

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

I stink at virtual plating my meals....

Post by vmsurbat » Thu Apr 12, 2012 7:32 am

4/12: Virtual plated dinner--ugh! Even though it *seemed* like a smallish amount overall, I ended up eating too much and felt slightly sick later. I really must stick with one appropriately-filled plate regardless of "how it might look to others" at a buffet when people expect you to take multiple small servings.
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

User avatar
NoSnacker
Posts: 1481
Joined: Sat Jun 11, 2011 12:40 am
Location: Buffalo, New York

Post by NoSnacker » Thu Apr 12, 2012 9:31 am

Hi Vicki, thanks so much for the information...it is very encouraging to see this.. I over the years I have learned to eat healthy from all the diets and health articles out there..but I do find that if I want a Wendy's burger and fries I get it, so that is a great change for me.

Did you have S days gone wild a lot or not too much? Last time on here I dropped off after 3 months as the binging from the weekends carried over into my weekdays..and I gave up the battle.

I am enjoying my meals more on N days, but there is still the diet head there...can't wait for that to leave the premise!



deb
Age 56: SBMI=30.6 (12/1/13) CBMI 28.9 (2/2/14) GBMI-24.8

SophiaLara
Posts: 30
Joined: Sat Mar 31, 2012 4:40 am

Post by SophiaLara » Fri Apr 13, 2012 12:53 am

Dear Vicki,

I just read your "negative qualification" post and it was so helpful to me! I'm amazed at your little slip-ups and how you can keep them just that: small slip-ups. I've been plagued with the "What the Hell?" mentality. I have a small slip and then say, what the hell? I've blown it for today! Might as well just throw in the towel for today.

Anyway, I'm going to keep an ongoing post of my "red" days, too. I think it will be helpful for me to keep those slips small, and not throw in the towel.

Thank you for posting here. You're very inspiring to those of us just starting the No S Journey.

Lara

Amy3010
Posts: 1284
Joined: Thu Apr 05, 2012 9:48 am
Location: Belgium

Post by Amy3010 » Fri Apr 13, 2012 6:34 am

I'm with Lara - this is very inspiring to read! Especially being short (5'3) and hypothyroid and pushing 50 myself :D ! Thanks for sharing how your eating evolved over the years, too. And good luck with your house guests - I know how that can trip things up.

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Sat Apr 14, 2012 2:45 pm

Amy3010 wrote: And good luck with your house guests - I know how that can trip things up.
Glad to be of help, ladies! And I appreciate the sympathy expressed! I dearly love our guests, but the number of opportunities for all kinds of little treats and slip-ups has increased exponentially! However, I *am* learning to be mindful of the times/events I'm most likely to earn a red. And *that* is a great habit to have!

Best success to you all,
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Wed Apr 25, 2012 8:40 am

4/24: More Virtual plating--this is really my downfall. I'm not gaining weight (and since I don't have much to lose anymore, I've not been losing at any great rate) but still, I feel like my habits are derailing--more "diethead chatter" than in a long time. One=done is SO FREEING.
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Fri May 04, 2012 5:24 am

5/03: With a long stretch between lunch and dinner due to an evening meeting, I opted for a glass of milk (legal) but then snitched the one lonely roasted asparagus leftover from a previous meal. Again, not a biggie calorie-wise/healthwise, but a disappointment in keeping habits.
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Fri May 18, 2012 2:42 pm

5/17: A neighbor brought over some apple strudel, still warm from the oven. I ate some, so a fail. Again, it was just a few bites, so no weight-control damage. But...not strict NoS compliance. And that is what THIS thread is all about.....
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Tue May 22, 2012 7:38 pm

5/22: Ate a cookie while having coffee with a friend.
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

lbb (Liz)
Posts: 682
Joined: Wed May 12, 2010 4:35 pm

Post by lbb (Liz) » Tue May 22, 2012 9:03 pm

Hi! I'm intrigued by your negative qualification and have read thru a few posts!
Thanks for the inspiration in keeping your fails small and just that...moving right along. Not an excuse to go hay-wire. Kinda a "oops" instead.
I have been struggling with bingeing and all or nothing thinking. DOn't have much more than about 5 pounds to lose (just want to), but have eating habits that will be the death of me, if kept up.
So I'm on the hunt to stay Vanilla No-S. People like you are so refreshing to hear from!
Thanks!
Liz

Sinnie
Posts: 1373
Joined: Sun Jul 17, 2005 10:09 pm

Post by Sinnie » Tue May 22, 2012 11:45 pm

I was directed to come and check out your thread - so glad I did! I love your negative qualification! As Liz said, it is so refreshing. It makes me feel like I can do that too. I admire your ability to say OOPS and move on. I need to do that. It seems like you just accept it, mark it down and...continue on with life. It shouldn't be a revelation but it kinda is for me :oops: Because I tend to be black and white, I can't usually stop myself. Thanks for a great thread!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Wed May 23, 2012 7:51 pm

Again, so glad to be of help. I think on my next testimonial (coming up in July!!), I'll link THIS thread as well, because it may help people see what one successful NoS lifestyle looks like: NoS compliance almost all the time except for those "oops" moments--not 100% perfection.

If you think about it, I've traded perma-snacking/mindless eating/overstuffing/diethead chatter/food angst for a NORMAL enjoyable lifestyle. Yes, there have been those "oops" moments--on average, one per week--but THAT's LIFE. It is a bit like driving the car. Most of the time, we go along just fine. Sometimes we don't/can't avoid a bump/dip/curb in the road ("oops" moments). We aren't suddenly BAD drivers; we just need to pay a bit more attention. Following NoS makes it easier to pinpoint where the attention should go!
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

lbb (Liz)
Posts: 682
Joined: Wed May 12, 2010 4:35 pm

Post by lbb (Liz) » Wed May 23, 2012 9:08 pm

Thanks for your inspiration! Great analogy :D
Liz

Amy3010
Posts: 1284
Joined: Thu Apr 05, 2012 9:48 am
Location: Belgium

Post by Amy3010 » Thu May 24, 2012 6:52 am

I'm looking forward to reading that testimonial! :D

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Sat May 26, 2012 2:32 pm

5/26: Took an extra piece of pizza. No excuse, just did it. :(
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

lbb (Liz)
Posts: 682
Joined: Wed May 12, 2010 4:35 pm

Post by lbb (Liz) » Sun May 27, 2012 4:42 am

i really admire how exact, strict and honest you are. that is really inspiring!
what are your S days like? pretty tame?
thanks.
Liz

lbb (Liz)
Posts: 682
Joined: Wed May 12, 2010 4:35 pm

Post by lbb (Liz) » Sun May 27, 2012 5:17 am

i really admire how exact, strict and honest you are. that is really inspiring!
what are your S days like? pretty tame?
thanks.
Liz

noni
Posts: 613
Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2009 2:01 pm

Post by noni » Wed May 30, 2012 1:25 pm

Thank you, Vicki, for your inspiration and detailed honesty. I am also in my 50's and 5'2". I had success on No S three years ago and almost reached my normal BMI, when continuous wild weekends and consequently the little weekday indiscretions made me lose heart, but not more weight. I am coming around for the 2nd time (maybe it's the 3rd or 4th time, as I had some false starts) where I originally started, plus a few more pounds, so you and the other regular seasoned posters are a big help to the rest of us.

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Thu Jun 07, 2012 7:58 pm

6/07: Had a guest over, put out peanuts and fruit for him, but ate some (too much!) myself. A true WTH moment.
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

vmsurbat
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:12 am
Location: Montenegro

Post by vmsurbat » Wed Jun 13, 2012 7:17 pm

06/13: While cleaning up after dinner, snitched a dried fig off the plate. Ooops!
Vicki in MNE
7! Yrs. with Vanilla NoS, down 55+lb, happily maintaining and still loving it!

Post Reply