Everyday Systems

Hey guys,

I'm not sure exactly what I need...a slap upside the head? A word of encouragement? Not sure. I started No 'S' AGAIN fairly recently and was doing well for a week, then got sick. I never really got going again. Since then, I've reverted back to old eating habits...eating to fill emotional needs, etc. I don't know if I'm bipolar, or if my reason for losing weight isn't strong enough. Part of me just doesn't care at all. I think that's what bothers me the most. Feel free to give me a kick in the pants or whatever...like I said, I'm not exactly sure what I'm looking for. I feel a bit like a drifter, if that makes any sense whatsoever.

You sound like me and the thing that gets me on track is cold-turkey-no-debating-it-this-is what's-going-to-happen vanilla No-S. Break the control that food has over me. It gets easier and easier the longer I comply.

Or, sometimes I just need a shocker, like my son telling me that I'm killing myself.

I can absolutely identify with feeling this way. Getting back on track can be so difficult, even though I KNOW I feel better when I eat the NoS way. I KNOW it's healthier for me. I've fallen off the wagon many times since I originally started this adventure two years ago. I don't know how old you are or what your weight situation is...and I don't know what your emotional patterns are so I won't pretend to know what would be the right "kick in the pants" for you.

I have a history of repeated weight loss & gain due to diets, as well as emotional eating & binging. What I needed may not be what you need...but what helped me was the realization that if I don't make a decision to be healthy, I'm making a decision to walk down the road to cholesterol & blood pressure medication, as well as other health issues. I want to control my food, not be controlled BY my food. Climbing back up after falling off the wagon is so hard, but what's the alternative? I want to move forward in my life....I want to fix what's not working & keep growing and my weight issues have been an emotional, physical, and spiritual issue for FAR too long, and have taken up FAR too much energy. I've decided to just "work the plan"....period. I'm striving to take each day and just do what I need to. Three meals...no snacks...no sweets...no seconds. Period. That's it. I try not to spend too much time dwelling on my weight or how long it'll take me to get rid of the pounds I don't want. I pick up my knitting, read to my daughter, get outside and garden (when it's not SNOWING!), or do anything to avoid letting myself get dragged into my old, negative "I'll never succeed anyway" downward emotional spiral.

Again, I don't know exactly what you need, and it sounds as if you might not know either....but you CAN do this. You can decide today to make today better than yesterday...you can decide today to "work the plan"...

Perhaps this may seem too simplistic, but this is my bottom line....I'm not analyzing anymore...just doing what I know to be healthy for me...one day at a time.

Success to you...

janie

Pretty sure words of encouragement are better than headslaps

I know what you mean about 'part of me just doesn't care at all', I have similar thoughts sometimes. I KNOW that I could be a lot healthier and losing weight would be good for me, but I have these thinking patterns of 'yes but I'm not THAT overweight' and 'but I loooove fooood!' and 'it's so haaaaard!' Ugh it sounds so pathetic when I write it down! I do know that I feel better at least trying to follow NoS than I do when I'm not. I know that I can just eat and eat when I'm not even hungry, and NoS helps me to put the brakes on that. I guess it's about finding the things that you DO want, not focusing on the things that you don't care about?

Guess what. The part that doesn't care at all is part of the brain pattern that protects the access to food. It has an incentive to keep you from thinking the thoughts that would stop the source. That is how emotional eating works! In fact, it's how HABIT works. It's a brain pattern that protects comfort! So it will make any thought that will keep the comfort pattern. It's too hard, I don't care, doesn't that sound good, I'm not that fat, etc. I know because the whole pattern has been fired up just by having a Friday fail, a semi-wild weekend and a Monday fail. I feel almost as caught as I did two years ago before I started No S seriously and lost 30 lbs. So I'm browsing to get my mojo back. Boy, it sounds like a long time until the weekend, but I know this is the moment I have to make the right decision! Nearly ALL longterm weightloss maintainers say the turnaround happened when they quit falling off the wagon for long periods of time, when they just got right back into the "right" pattern right after a failure.

So, just get to the next three meals in compliance NO MATTER WHAT!

Great reply, oolala. Get back into the three meals compliance as soon as possible. When you get red-streaking, it's so much easier to keep that up.

One amazing thing about No-S is all the emotional stuff it brings to the surface. It reminds me when I was in an eating disorder clinic 12 years ago...meal times were set and we were kept from any choice, any food on our own, etc. It really de-sensitized food and brought up A LOT OF EMOTIONS.

I totally believe we establish habits and sometimes it's merely JUST THAT. But we do what WORKS. And obviously, when we over-eat, it's DOING SOMETHING FOR US. I know tonight while practicing piano with my son and wanting to poke my eyes out (it felt late) I was dying to open a chocolate bar. I wanted to "use" chocolate to "get me through".

Anyways, I don't know where I'm going with this. Other than...this is the way to get back to moderation. When I'm tempted to quit, I think of how I've been a better mom, wife, sister, etc. while on No-S. I am more focused on the moment and not preoccupied with food. That alone will keep me truckin'!

We're here for yoU!

Wow, some great advice here. I understand what you are going through, too, and I wish you the best. All I can add is, hang in there and just take it one day, or even one meal at a time. Keep moving forward and don't get stuck in beating yourself up over past mistakes.