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Advice needed re special days

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 4:39 pm
by Imogen Morley
I'm wondering if you consider days off work (I mean regular weekdays) as special. I do. I always plan fun things to do, meet some friends in town, whip up something special and time-consuming to eat, spend the whole morning reading in bed... Sooo much looking forward to tomorrow! :D
The problem is, after five pretty successful weeks, this one has been full of both little and big fails. I happily gobbled down a piece of my coworker's birthday cake (I don't even like her :oops: ), I had one legitimate S-day (my parents' 36th anniversary, celebrated with a multicourse dinner - plus dessert - in a fancy restaurant), and one when I stepped into a cozy chocolaterie to buy handmade pralines for the fast-approaching weekend... and several hours after devoured all of them, one by one. I'm a bit antsy about stepping on a scale on Saturday morning - during the last five weeks I've lost almost 8 pounds, slowly but steadily. I think the damage will be worse if I take Friday as special and then have two regular S-days - even though they have ceased to be idiotic. Not to mention Easter (with its cheesecakes :wink: ) is coming...
What would you do in my place?

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 5:02 pm
by NoelFigart
I'm self-employed. Some weeks I work 80 hours, others 20. I don't have a work schedule that has a "real" weekend per-se.

I just take my S-days on Saturday, Sunday and holidays and let it be.

On weeks where I don't have a lot of work, YES YES YES, I want to do something special to relax, and yes, that may involve more complex cooking than usual. But as long as no Sweet, Snack or Second is involved, I don't see that it is an issue.

I tend to focus on non-food things. Lately I've been learning to do fancy manicures on myself. It's fun and you can't eat while the nail polish is drying :) (I'm wearing red tips with a gold glitter stripe right now. Sort of a weird take on the French).

Some people consider making sure that your NWS days (Non-Weekend S days) average out to two a month or fewer. I think it's a decent rule of thumb.

Re: Advice needed re special days

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 5:08 pm
by Nicest of the Damned
Imogen Morley wrote:I'm wondering if you consider days off work (I mean regular weekdays) as special. I do. I always plan fun things to do, meet some friends in town, whip up something special and time-consuming to eat, spend the whole morning reading in bed... Sooo much looking forward to tomorrow! :D
For me, days off work are not S days, unless they're special days for some other reason. It's possible to have an S day that is also a work day, too. I'm Jewish, so I don't automatically get a day off for all our holidays. I do take S days for Jewish holidays, but I don't always take days off work.

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 5:38 pm
by wosnes
I used to regularly work weekends (well, 12-16 hours on Saturday). When I was doing that, then one of my weekdays off was an S day. But if I had a weekday off in addition to the weekend, then no, it wouldn't be an S day.

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 5:41 pm
by Thalia
Agreed -- you can make something special and lovely and time-consuming for dinner, and still just eat one plateful with no snacks or sweets. Having a day off work is not a ceremonial eating occasion, like Easter or Christmas or your birthday ...

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 6:09 pm
by Nicest of the Damned
Thalia wrote:Agreed -- you can make something special and lovely and time-consuming for dinner, and still just eat one plateful with no snacks or sweets.
I'm not to the point yet where I could make something special and lovely and time-consuming and not eat more than one plate of it, at least not without resenting the hell out of having to stop at one plateful. Maybe someday...

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 6:37 pm
by Thalia
Really? What if it was something really FILLING and lovely and special and time-consuming? :wink: And you know you'd have leftovers to take for lunch the next day, or have for dinner again?

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 7:54 pm
by milliem
Thalia wrote:Really? What if it was something really FILLING and lovely and special and time-consuming? :wink: And you know you'd have leftovers to take for lunch the next day, or have for dinner again?
I always love when I make something I really enjoy to eat and know that I'll have some
leftover to eat the next day :) Plus I'm slightly lazy so if I know I don't have to cook the next day or make something for lunch then it's an extra incentive to keep leftovers!

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 7:58 pm
by NoelFigart
I don't know if this would help wrap your mind around it, Nicest, but something that's really helpful to me (and one of the reasons the No-S part of my habits is the easiest to stick to) is that at any one meal, I tell myself I can make something REALLY TASTY for my next meal if I really want to, so there's no need to overeat on THIS really tasty meal.

And then there's always S days for a bit of excess if I need it. It's what helps me relax about it.

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 7:59 pm
by Nicest of the Damned
Thalia wrote:Really? What if it was something really FILLING and lovely and special and time-consuming? :wink: And you know you'd have leftovers to take for lunch the next day, or have for dinner again?
I'd probably still be mad when I had to stop eating at one plateful.

I generally reserve time-consuming stuff, special stuff, and stuff I really like for S days. Often, if I'm going to make something special, I do it for Friday night dinner, because that's Shabbat. I believe Shabbat dinner should be the nicest dinner of the week, if possible.

The only time I'd really have the time, energy, and motivation to make something time-consuming and special and have it not be an S day is if I made it for Sunday night dinner (I start my days at dinner time, so Friday night Shabbat dinner can be an S meal). I generally lack at least one of time, energy, or motivation on other days. And I strongly associate having something special with an S day, in my mind. Making a fancy, time-consuming dinner for an ordinary Sunday night would seem as odd as having dessert on a Tuesday, to me. I guess that's just how I've implemented my No S habits.

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 8:03 pm
by NoelFigart
Nicest, I agree that if you're follow the tradition, Shabbat dinner should be the best dinner of the week if possible!

I don't personally see anything wrong with reserving foods you've tagged as "special" for S days if that's working for you. I think I might have misunderstood what you were saying and I'm sorry about that.

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 8:12 pm
by chickadee11
Are your days off from work always the same?

Friday and Saturdays are my S days.I work Friday during the day~but Friday night is definitely my families celebration time.This usually entails ordering pizza,steak and shrimp,fondue,adult beverages you name it!Saturdays are my day off and thoroughly enjoy taking that as an S day,but I go back to work on Sunday night so I find it easy to get right back to business.

If you do more socially on your days off you may want to change your S day calender.Which would make it the NO W/TH diet or whatever?!?Of coarse we always have our special occasion days to look forward to,isn't this diet great??

Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 8:55 pm
by Clarica
Hi,

I have to learn to look at extra food as waste rather than a treat. So I could start to resent extra food as readily as I still sometimes resent skipping it.

Philosophical coping mechanisms aside, just load your plate with what you know you would resent leaving out. If it's on the plate, you're golden. Get a bigger plate if you have to, for special "non-special" occaissions. I think it's better to deal with the resentment with honest excess--keeping to the plate rule but filling it up--than by cheating because the rule is too hard.

You may have a short-term penalty or delay on the scales, but the reinforcement of habit and the satisfaction of not falling off the wagon on purpose will help down the line.

Eating the right amount of food--less food--is not punishing yourself, of course. It's just correcting an error. An unlike wasting water or paper, you have to carry extra, "wasted" food around with you. But years of habit telling you you "deserve" excess are hard to break. Really hard! I'm definitely not over it.

Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2011 1:20 am
by NoSRocks
I also work Saturdays and Sundays but still take them as my S Days. Sorry, but I would not consider taking weekdays off work as S Days.

Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2011 1:28 am
by kccc
I think the 2-per-month (on average) rule of thumb is a good one.

Just being off work would not be sufficient to be "special," to me. However, I tend not to do many NWS at all unless I'm on vacation.

The fact that you're thinking that it feels excessive might be telling you something.

With all that said... it's your call. :)

Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2011 5:59 am
by Imogen Morley
Thanks a lot for all the opinions! KCCC's comment tipped the scales.

I'm having a special day not centered around food.