Everyday Systems

I'm a total stress case.
I'm eating out of lonliness, frustration, worry, boredom.

DH is gone a lot with his job (navy) and I am stuck here very far from family. I think this latest trigger is my good friend's dh is being transferred (navy also) and so that takes her and her daughter, who is my 4 yr old's friend away.

I've had a hard time making friends here in MD, for some reason. The people here just are not friendly to military.

Anyway, so I eat.

I've eaten up from my goal weight which I made this past christmas of 218 and now back up to 223.
Top that with my immune/joint problem (ankylosing spondylitis) flare up and I've backed off the exercise (biking/jogging/walking) as well.

UGH.

I'm very frustrated. Was talking wiht a friend today who is doing weight watchers and I found myself browsing ww website but it's just SO much fuss.

The thing is... I KNOW how to eat well. It seems like when I wake up in the morning, if I skip breakfast, then I generally don't have a huge issue with snacking that day. If I start the day with breakfast, I just don't stop.

For instance, I'll have an egg, a piece of toast and some soysage. And then I'll have a granola bar, and then dig into the chips and... on and on. Then lunch arrives, whether or not I'm hungry, I eat that too and then I usually graze up to supper (again, not hungry!) eat that too and then insist on dessert and again a late night snack.
I've fallen into my old habits! UGH. It's like I've totally said Screw It to my determination and sensibility.

Monday starts a new N day. No SNacks, No Seconds (thankfully at least at meal times this has stuck with me) and NO SWEETS!! WIthout paying $10 a week for weight watchers weigh ins and special (over processed) microwave foods. Yuck.

I can do this.
I hope!
Thanks for listening. Feels good to get this all out!

shamrockmommy wrote:I'm a total stress case.
The thing is... I KNOW how to eat well. It seems like when I wake up in the morning, if I skip breakfast, then I generally don't have a huge issue with snacking that day. If I start the day with breakfast, I just don't stop.

Do you start the day with ENOUGH breakfast? Like.... about 1/3 of the food you plan to eat for the day?

A light breakfast won't do it No Sing. It has to be about the same size as lunch and dinner for No S to work out well.

Probably not. Mornings are always hectic, trying to get the kids to eat SOMEthing (they are darn picky!). They're turning into permasnackers lately.

I need to be sure to get a fruit/veggie in at every meal, including b'fast!

Our standard morning breakfast these days:

The night before, put equal amounts of old-fashioned oatmeal and milk in a bowl. (Enough for hefty servings for everyone.) Add a dash of salt, and cinnamon if desired. Cover and place in fridge overnight.

In the AM, just heat by the bowl for everyone - about a minute in the microwave. That's faster than instant! Add toppings to suit each person. (I like bananas and a trail mix that has nuts and dried fruit; my son likes a drizzle of honey. My husband adds LOTS of cinnamon and some sugar.) Serve with OJ and it's done... nice and filling!

I also eat it cold in summer - still good.

Can you think of a natural "end" to breakfast? Cup of coffee? Brushing teeth? It's easy for me to stop eating in the morning, b/c I have to leave the house - but I have to plan an "end" for dinner because I'll eat to put off tasks I don't want to do. Can you plan something fun to do right after breakfast that you WANT to get to? What else will break the momentum?

Hope something here is useful.

Welcome back.

I agree that you need to try for a bigger breakfast, with a final step that tells your mind and body - that is it till lunch.

((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))))))) I know it is not easy (I am the queen of snacking and being able to justify it) but you can do this for yourself.

Hi Tiffani!

I've missed ya! But I'm sorry you're stressing-I can sympathize!

Can you get the kids out of the house after b-fast? Maybe going for a walk or to the park would help break the perma-snack cycle.

(I need to take my own advice! I just ate cookies and its only Monday MORNING! )

I am trying to get back on track too-DH is actually doing this with me, but we both need to get more serious.

Anyway, just wanted to offer some support and {{{{{hugs}}}}}! You've proven you CAN do this-I have faith in ya! I know you can!

Thanks everyone. This week I"m doing a lot better and had 3 successful N days in a row. TGISaturday tomorrow!!

I just had to get strict with the tummy toddler and set down some boundaries and limitations!!

Hi Sham... I just found this thread, after reading your awesome response to mine. Go back and read it if you need to, cuz your advice was great, and that tells me you've got it in you girl.

I can really relate to your personal situation but from way back. I grew up military and then married one many years ago. We moved to Hawaii for his first tour, and in lots of ways that was really cool, BUT the locals treated military like we were dirt. It was really frustrating and certainly difficult to meet anyone non military, so we stuck close to the people on base. I know it's even harder to do something like this eating plan, when you feel alone. Even with your precious little ones to soak up a lot of your time, you still feel lonely sometimes. There's got to be some more positive ways to channel those thoughts into doing something better than hurting your body with "bad stuff". (I need to listen to this idea/concept my own self honey, believe you me.) And now with yours and your daughter's friends leaving, that really bites.

Do you live on base?Are there any women's groups around that you could get involved with... book clubs, helping new military families settle in, babysitting groups that allow each other to take turns to have time to themselves.... etc..? My son and daughter in law live on base, and she's involved with stuff like that... but even if you don't live on base, I think you could still hook up with something... just thoughts flowing thru my silly brain right now.

You may not be remotely interested in something like that. I just know how challenging military life can be sometimes, all the while exciting and something new all the time. My son just returned from Baghdad exactly one year from when he left (and I was diagnosed with my leukemia 2 weeks later)... now one year later, I'm in remission and my baby is home. What more could anyone ask for, ya know? Now I know it's time to focus on taking care of myself and hopefully prevent it from coming back.

Keep hangin honey.... judging from what you wrote to me, you certainly know what's up... and I really have faith in your strength. Besides, you GOTTA be strong to be married to a military man.

Shamrockmommy, I totally love your "tummy toddler" phrase. That's it exactly - the same repetition of "no, this is how we do it" over and over and over, and the same toddler stubbornness until the kid finally gets that we MEAN it.... perfect metaphor.

THanks everyone. I'm doing much better. It's my 2nd (hope to be) solid week of N days.
Bump, i'ts nice to hear someone with the same experiences! I tend to avoid the spouse clubs and whatnot because off the little cliques that typically form. But I might look inot the mom's gtroup that meets weekly on base.

KCCC, I just pulled the toddler metaphor out of nowhere LOL. It's very relevent to where I am in life- being a mom, struggling setting boundaries and limitations with my 4 yr old and 1.5 yr old, it seemed fitting!

I"m also going to post at least once daily to keep myself on track. I love this board for the encouraging support!

KCCC wrote:Shamrockmommy, I totally love your "tummy toddler" phrase. That's it exactly - the same repetition of "no, this is how we do it" over and over and over, and the same toddler stubbornness until the kid finally gets that we MEAN it.... perfect metaphor.

There's a website that I find quite useful in taming your "tummy toddler", and that's www.thebratfactor.com The idea is that you ask yourself "who's in charge" at various times. If it's your inner brat, you have to take back control, while still making things fun to do. Just thought you might like the reassurance that you're not alone in this struggle (though some aspects of the site do seem a bit split personality to me!)

I hope you enjoy