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Habit-management focus needed

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2007 3:28 pm
by kccc
I have been doing No-S with relative success for a while now, but the holidays have pointed up a flaw in my routine.

No-S days are normally work days.
S-days are normally when I am at home.

I have realized this week that I tend to do well on No-S days, because I'm mostly at work. I've only had to break the "graze from dinner until bedtime habit" at home. (And yes, I changed some work habits, too.)

However, on S-days, I'm really still perma-snacking most of the day. Less overall food than it USED to be, but the pattern is the same old one. Essentially, my habits AT HOME haven't really changed all that much.

This is particularly an issue when N-days fall on at-home days - which is happening a lot during the holiday season, of course. Or like today, when I'm working at home.

I feel as if I'm starting over, fighting food cues all day.

The hardest habit is snacks. I can get through an N-day at home with no sweets, but I really, really want to snack. (And sometimes do.)

Tips? Ideas?

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2007 4:03 pm
by mimi
Try some of these - maybe you'll find one that will help:

1. Plan your meals in advance - Plan to have really good meals on N-days that you can look forward to. Dangle that in front of yourself and say - "Don't eat that snack because you're having _____ for lunch, or _____ for dinner!"

2. When you're at home on a No-S day, try filling your plates just a little bit fuller than maybe you would on an N day at work - the idea of more good food at meal times may help you to not reach for the snacks.

3. Keep the hard-to-resist snacks out of the house. Then you will have to dress and drive somewhere to get them. Maybe by that time you'll change your mind. Personally I can't keep ice-cream in the house. When I want ice-cream we go to Dairy Queen or Cold Stone and have something really good - on an S day!

4. Build the habit one day at a time. I try to avoid snacks or snacking even on S-days simply because it erodes the habit I've worked hard all week to build and maintain. I'll plan to have something sweet on S-days, but I eat it with a meal or go out to get it (like mentioned above)

5. Reward yourself for each successful day with whatever (non-food) is pleasing for you. Try putting stickers up on your calendar - cross each successful day off with a glitter pen - buy a new book to read, etc.

Hope these help!
Mimi

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2007 5:07 pm
by kccc
Mimi, this is VERY helpful.

I realized, reading your post, that I don't tend to plan my lunches as well when I'm at home - and I'll eat standing up, or while doing other tasks, instead of eating a proper meal. So, of course the boundaries blur.

And under-cutting my No Snacks habit on S-days is not a good practice. It was okay while I needed the total freedom of S's... but now, it's a real hindrance to habit-development. (Though I may make it "a limited number of snacks" rather than completely cutting them on S-days. But I'll at least draw a line around them, and make them special.)

I AM going to learn to manage at-home N-days!!

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2007 5:45 pm
by mimi
Yes, you are! And ask for help (like you did) when you need it! We're here!

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2007 6:38 pm
by kccc
That's one of the things I love about this forum - everyone is genuinely helpful.

And all of us together are smarter than any one of us. I recognized a little of the same advice I've given to newer folks in your post - but somehow, I couldn't pull it up for myself. (Plus you had other useful ideas as well.)

And even with stuff I "know," somehow YOU saying it to ME has so much more effect than me saying to myself would have had.

Thanks again!

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2007 6:39 pm
by kccc
That's one of the things I love about this forum - everyone is genuinely helpful.

And all of us together are smarter than any one of us. I recognized a little of the same advice I've given to newer folks in your post - but somehow, I couldn't pull it up for myself. (Plus you had other useful ideas as well.)

And even with stuff I "know," somehow YOU saying it to ME has so much more effect than me saying to myself would have had.

Thanks again!

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2007 8:53 pm
by Spook
Just wanted to say that I've been struggling with exactly the same problem recently. NoSing at home is really like having a whole new habit to learn. And I've got a few more non-work NoS-days coming up next week - so this thread has been incredibly helpful for me. Thanks!

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2007 11:19 pm
by kccc
I did it! (Today, anyway. It's after dinner, and I'm enjoying a glass of wine as a reward.)

It really is like "starting over" again in some ways. But Mimi's post was such a help!!

And recognizing some of the ideas (like #1) and thinking "oh, yeah, that works for me on work days" made me think about what ELSE worked for me before. I did break a lot of habits at work - eating to avoid a task, for a break, out of boredom or stress (yup, both).

Bigger, planned meals. That's the first thing.

I can create the same habits for home as for work. And it should be easier, because I've done it before elsewhere, right?

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 2:13 pm
by reinhard
KCCC,

Congratulations!

Everything I have to say has been said here already, but repetition can be helpful so here goes:

1. Bigger meals.

2. Reach for a drink instead of a snack -- even a caloric drink, if necessary.

3. Make "no snacks" a top priority until you really get the habit down. I know you're doing chain of self command style punch cards, so maybe even promote it to "most important task" or CAPITALIZE it or something or at least stick in on there somehow.

4. If you think S-day snacking is messing with habit formation, consider making a distinction between ordinary, lowercase-s days (weekends and minor holidays), and really special capital-S days (major holidays like Thanksgiving or Christmas). On lowercase-s days, maybe keep the no-snacks rule: seconds and sweets are really sufficient reward. On capital-S days, you get total freedom. There aren't very many of these so habit-damage is limited (and the temptations are so strong that it would be futile to resist anyway).

Reinhard

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 2:37 pm
by kccc
Thanks, Reinhard! And yes, it IS helpful to hear it again.

#2 is very useful - I noticed yesterday that I don't tend to drink as much at home, and that's something to work on. (At work, I have a small coffeepot that I use to make hot herbal tea, and I drink it all day long - no calories, warming, yummy.)

I also like the tweak in #4 - it's sensible, clear, and not too restrictive. I don't think I'll even cut ALL snacks on "small-s" days, just limit to ONE - IF I really WANT it, which is a key question! Often I'm just looking for something to do that isn't some sort of work. ;)

So really, it's the leftover bit of perma-snacking habit that I want to break. (And I have a sneaking suspicion that I may drop those last 5 lbs if I make that one single change.)

No-S@home is a new game. But the skills from No-S@work do apply.

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 4:42 pm
by mimi
Congratulations, KCCC! So glad to be of help. My 21st day is Friday and I'm anxious to weigh and see what kind of results I'll have. As long as the number is down, I'll be satisfied!

Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 12:25 pm
by funfuture
Thanks so much for this discussion - the tips are great. Really timely and very helpful. :-) Am defnitely going to to concentrate on not permasnacking on S days!
Wim

Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 1:54 am
by BrightAngel
KCCC wrote:And all of us together are smarter than any one of us.
Good Thoughts.

Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 8:39 pm
by flipturn
Hi, all -- This is a helpful discussion for me. I am going on my third No S weekend, and, as Reinhard suggested, I permitted myself sweets but not seconds or snacking. Now that I think about it, though, let's say that I treat myself in the same way, with iced cookies from a nice bakery. These cookies are about 3" in diameter and are iced like a cupcake. I ate one on Saturday afternoon as a snack, but I didn't think of it as a snack because I only ate one. Snacks in my mind are things that lead to binges. But should I have this or any other sweet as dessert? Would I eat less at the meal and use a virtual plate? I am not obsessing, I just want to make sure that I instill the right habits.

Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 11:55 pm
by kccc
Flipturn, I think that this is something that varies for every person. Remember, you can't do S-days "wrong," especially at the beginning.

I have an issue with snacks, but not everyone does. If you don't, then don't sweat it.

It sounds to me as if your S-day treats were both special and contained - both of which are good.

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:20 am
by flipturn
Right, KCCC, I forgot about the "no sweat" part. Thanks for your input!

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 3:17 am
by CrazyCatLady
reinhard wrote:
2. Reach for a drink instead of a snack -- even a caloric drink, if necessary.
This has been so helpful for me! When it is getting late in the day at work, and I'm feeling desperate, I have some hot chocolate, in a ceramic mug. No styrofoam for me! I told myself I could have it every afternoon....but I only need it once every week or two.

And milk in the evening...if I get a twinge of craving or hunger, I tell myself that I can have a small glass of milk. I've only actually had it once or twice, but knowing that it is available saves me. Then if the hunger continues, I know the milk will get me through. And if I'm really not hungry, I just wait it out!

And it never turns into a binge or permasnacking!

Great ideas in this thread!

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 1:21 pm
by BrightAngel
I need to keep this in mind.
I believe that yesterday's snack and sweet attack might have been avoided
if in the afternoon, before getting into the cupboard,
I had sat down and sipped a small glass of tomato juice,
or a cup of my sugar-free hot cocoa.